The Official Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey

The Saturday Night Live writer and longtime Internet favorite hosts and doles out his much sought after inspirational quotations. He also voices the Deep Thoughts, as often seen and heard on TV. There's a new D.T. daily, plus the past week's selections are, um, handy.

(Handey ... handy! That's comedy writing! And I'm not all that deep. Really.)

Also, find humorous articles written by Jack Handey, plus his short Fuzzy Memories videos resurrecting the past.

And now, a closing deep thought...

"Sometimes I just feel like curling up on the floor in front of the fireplace, and just rolling around the room, like a tumbleweed, and not even caring if I knock things over, or break them. And if people get mad, maybe because it's their house or something, you can just shake your head and go, "What happened?"

Mind Expand: Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey