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Father's Week

THE MIKE DURRETT SHOW and Tell:
The Funny Site of the Day

06/14/00

The World According to Homer Simpson
Dozens of quotes from everyone's favorite dad, collected at Todd's Undersea Playground.

"If something goes wrong, blame the guy who can't speak English."

"Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose ... it's how drunk you get."

"Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."

"Mmmmm... floor pie."

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