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The Britney Invasion
by Mike Durrett

The Britney Papers
When you're the center of the universe, as Britney Spears is with her allegedly fabulous store-bought chest and allegedly immense talent, you can expect to receive fan mail from all quarters, including highfalutin literary behemoths. Hey, they hum, too.

"Modern Humorist" has obtained a sampling of "love" notes to the bouncy star from none other than the allegedly celebrated Camille Paglia, Martin Amis, J. D. Salinger, George Plimpton and Norman Mailer. These homies be sending a shout out to their Britney. Word up!