Crazy Horoscopes

The Funny Site of the Day -- More than your current horoscope, discover your romantic compatibility, astrological makeup, and dream interpretations. You can trust the accuracy because it's by The Goblin Prince. Let's see. I'm a Pisces. Please do not touch me. Here's my horoscope.

''You've heard the expression, 'It's better to give your friends lots of marshmallows instead of foaming soap granules." Well, the same goes for your collection of jellyfish - they're not something you can use to spark off an intimate relationship with pork beans. Perhaps playing a musical turnip through your nose could help your situation."

Hmm. Contraction. My wife's guru told us to hum hummus.

Crazy Horoscopes might best be considered grown-ups' material. I haven't read it all. The pork beans monopolize my time.

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