'Reader's Digest' Smilestone
Saturday August 27, 2005
"Reader's Digest" reached a notable plateau in August with the publication of its 1000th issue and that means a lot of humor, mostly based on true experiences, has tickled the American public. "'Laughter, The Best Medicine' has appeared in 'Reader’s Digest' magazine since 1947. Over 20 million people have submitted jokes, quotes and funny stories," states a press release, further boasting the magazine "has awarded $25 million dollars to humor contributors. And in the wake of World War II and the Korean War, 'Humor in Uniform' was launched becoming an immediate hit and receiving thousands of entries from soldiers, veterans and their families."
Enjoy five of the many jokes and anecdotes to have graced "Reader's Digest" over the years -- and, then, 50 more....
Enjoy five of the many jokes and anecdotes to have graced "Reader's Digest" over the years -- and, then, 50 more....
The well-dressed man entered our bank wanting to buy five silver dollars, which he would give as gifts.
“How much for them?” he asked, when I handed him the coins.
“That will be five dollars,” I said.
Handing them back, he said, “Forget it. That’s too much.”
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I was leaning over the shoulder of one of one of my students, helping her with some math problems, when I noticed the pencil sew was writing with. It had the Ten Commandments listed on it.
“I like your pencil very much,” I told her.
“Yeah, I like it too,” she said. “That’s why I stole it from my brother.”
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Recently, our 19-year-old daughter started hunting for her first real job. She spent an afternoon filling out application forms, leaving them on the kitchen table to finish later. As I walked by, a section of the application on top jumped out at me. Under “Previous Employment” she wrote, “Baby Sitting.” In answer to “Reason for Leaving,” she replied, “Parents came home.”
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A rabbi, a priest, and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, “Is this some kind of joke?”
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Upon arrival at Gatwick Airport, near London, I got in the foreign visitors line. My husband, an English citizen, headed for British Customs. I handed the officer my passport. “Purpose of trip?” he asked.
“Pleasure,” I replied. “I’m on my honeymoon.”
“Interesting,” the officer said stamping a page. “Most women bring their husbands with them.”
More: "Reader's Digest" 50 Funniest Jokes | "Reader's Digest" Laugh Lines
Related: Humor Boy's Blog: Hard to Digest
Comments
I have a very funny story I had hoped to enter in the $30,000 contest. Ad said to go to readersdigest.com/funnyjokes. I cannot seem to get through. WHAT SHOULD I DO? Snail mail it?
ThanX, Greta
Sorry, I’m not familiar with the ad or a contest. I’d try my best to follow the directions as stated. Maybe the site will correct the technical problem or have a customer service link posted somewhere. Good luck.
Tried to get through to “readersdersdigest.com/funnyjokes” #30,000.00 contest because I have a funny joke to send. Could not get through. What should I do now??
I have funny quote, cant get though. What should I do/??
Well, I’m somewhat comforted to see that I’m not the only person that cannot enter said contest ! Is the joke on us ? Please place a link for us to click on if….in fact…there is a contest !
I have a funny joke to send-page nine says to go to readersdigest/.com/funny joke-Now what?
I’ve tried at least 4 different times to submit my joke to readers digest and couldn’t. Is this a waste of time?
Ialso have tried to follow directions for submitting a funny story. I guess the joke is on us.
Anne
I have also got a funny story to tell and was hoping to enter the $30,000 contest. Could someone please let us know how to do that?
I see several valid questions posted, but where are the answers?
Stop asking for jokes if we can’t get through.
for those of you who really do have a good joke don’t waste your time. the liberal pinheads who took over this rag won’t think it’s funny. 30 thou. prize. if you believe that, you’ll believe anything obama tells you. and you’re probably not reading this anyway.
This is a big scam. False advertising !
How about we all sue Readers Digest for false advertising……YOU CAN WIN $30,000.00 in the bull…. contest…
Dear Readers Digest,
I’m having trouble digesting the fact that you
have not put a valid e-mail address in your publication for this contest,at least rectify the situation and give everyone the correct one!!! I guess the JOKE was on us.
Dear Readers Digest,
I’m having trouble digesting the fact that you
have not put a valid e-mail address in your publication for this contest,at least rectify the situation and give everyone the correct one!!! I guess the JOKE was on us.
That isn’t funny - asking for funny jokes and then not allowing people to get through.
I absolutely agree!!! If I lived in Australia, I would be all set as there is an application for them. I guess I’ll just keep the laughs to myself. If an Australian wins this contest, we’ll know something is fishy!!!
It is October 28th and I can’t find any way to submit my joke.
I’d like to submit a funny, but true story but, can’t seem to find how to do it at the website given in the magazine!
Don’t get too upset. Just another one of RD scams. They make millions $ on our jokes but are too stingy to pay $100.00 so they give us the wrong info. Way to go Digest the Readers
I have a joke to submit but could not find a link to submit it.Please help me.
I have a funny one!!!! Too bad I can’t share it. Why waste a page in your magazine??
Same comment as the others….why put this ad in the Readers Digest if there is not contest? Disappointing!!!
I followed your instructions to enter the
funny jokes contest. To my dismay, there is
nothing on your website to show this contest.
Poor planning on RD’s part. Let me know the correct way to enter, preferably BEFORE the
dead line. Thanks.
Dear Reader’s Digest : I love your book , and the content’s . The funny stuff is funny . I have afunny event also Hopefully I can present it too you all soon . Keep up the good work .
Last month while shopping for vitamins at one of the super discount stores I noticed a man in my isle intently reading the data on a package. As he was near the laxative items I naturaly thought he was looking for a laxative. I sidled along side and said “My wife has had wonderful success with Doctor Donohue’s formula.” He turns to me with a big smile and says”I do not have that problem, I am looking for something for dry eyes.” FLOOR PLEASE OPEN UP!
M. J. Snyder
I have a good joke. How do I submit it. I tried your page but it didn’t say how to do it.
What am I supposed to do? Jake
Where do I sent a joke?
Yes, another dissatisfied customer. Can’t get my funny story entered in the sweeps. What seems to be the problem. Either there is a legit sweeps or there isn’t.
I have a funny story but I could not get though when I searched online for: readersdigest.com/funnyjokes. I am glad to see that I wasn’t the only one to get through. So is this a true sweeps or isn’t there one at all?
11-19-08, I sent by joke thought, (submit your Joke) at the rd website, with proper format. This should enter me into the 30K, sweepstakes, Thank you. Frank
I tried to get through your website to submit a funny story but can’t pull up page. Is there another website I can to through.
I have a funny story– but cannot get through where can we go????????
Imagine my surprise when I read the Sept. 2008 issue of the “Our 50 funniest (true!) Stories” and on joke #40 seen my name. The joke is I never sent in a funny of any kind. I was just wondering how my name was used when I know it wasn’t me? Do you know how? I just can’t imagine there is two of us with the exact same name.
The joke is on all who try to post a joke….so this is a true funny story.
I’m trying also to submit a joke but all I get is someone’s column on jokes. They are very funny, but doesn’t help me submit mine!
I was able to submit a joke in both places. Type readers digest (two words) into your browser. CLick on readers digest. Scroll to the bottom. Under the heading “Stay in touch” click on submit a joke. It will allow you to submit it for the regular magazine subscription and for the funniest joke in the world submission. Hope this helps people.
I’ve jokes to share and has sent it to Readers Digest but have not seen it being publish.
Sweetie
I, like the rest of you, have tried to submit a funny story. So, what have any of you done to get thru to “The Editors”? I was told to write. Which means my letter might get opened a year from now, if that soon, or it will be lost in the shuffle. Please tell us how to get thru to them.
Considering the endless stories I’ve sent, this old cliche will get my point across. “Gee my grandmother was slow but she was old.” Maybe it’s because I’ve been floating around the Pacific on a very active volcano. Well, Mr. Seinfeld states:”Ya-da-ya-da!” However, I still enjoy the one and only Reader’s Digest.
I would like to submit an amusing thing that happened but can’t get a link to do it. Please let me know the secret.
Thanks